T'CHER:What do we do with crude oil?S'dent:Teach it some manners

History Teacher : From where to where did the mughals rule ? Student: Sir, I am not sure but I think from page 15 to 26.

Height of technical thinking... A software person falling from the roof of a building and shouting F1 F1 F1 instead of help help......!!

Teache"Where is Himalaya?"Student: "Madam, I dont know."Teache"Dont know?? Stand on the desk."Student: "I still cant see.

An englishman, bihari & punjabi were standing on roof. They decided to throw down whatever was available in excess with them. Englishman threw pounds, Bihari threw rice & Punjabi threw the Bihari down.

Dentist: I have to pull the aching tooth, but don't worry it will take just five minutes. Patient: And how much will it cost? Dentist: It's Rs 1000. Patient: One thousand for just a few minutes work??? Dentist: I can extract it very slowly if you like

Man-i want a divorce. My wife hasnt spoken 2 me for six months now! Judge-better think it over! Wives like that are hard 2 get!

Wife:Yester-night I saw a dream that u were sending me jewellery and clothes! Husband: Yeah, I saw ur dad paying the bill !!!

School girl : I dont want to take SEX EDUCATION class Teacher : Why not? School girl : Someone told me FINAL EXAM would be oral!

1st thief:Oh ! The police is here. Quick! Jump out of the window!2nd thief: But this is the 13th floor.1st thief: Hurry! this is no time for superstitions

Judge to accused: Have you anything to offer before I pass sentence on you?Accused: No, Your Honour. My lawyer took my last dollar.

Frnd1: u have married with 1 of the twin sisters, how do u recognize ur wife? Frnd2: why should I ? : )