Every man wants a wife who is beautiful, understanding, economical and a good cook..... But the law allows only one wife

A father to his adopted son "Whats the height of laziness?" Son replied "What more than havin an adopted son.

FathWhich r d 2 hardest things U learnt in College?Son: Opening Beer botles wth teeth & Lighting Cigarete wth only 1 Match Left In Heavy wind!

Can I go to the theatre? Asks a mosquito ot her mother. "yes but be aware, pay attention during the applause."

Wife: Im ashamed of the way we live; papa pays the house rent, my brother sends food and clothing, aunty pays our electric and water bills and my friend Sheela buys us movie tickets.I dont like to complain but now its too much. Husband: U shud be ashamed; uve still got 1 sister and 2 brothers, who dont send us even a single penny.

Girl: Will you love me after marriage also? Boy: This depends on your husband, if he allows me.

Patient: Doctor, you must help me. I'm under such a lot of stress. I keep losing my temper with people. Doctor: Tell me about your problem. Patient: I just did, you stupid bastard!

Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do? Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes

Question Girl : Do you love me ? Boy : Yes Dear Girl : Would you die for me ? Boy : No, mine is undying love!

A girl phoned me the other day and said..."Come on over, there's nobody home." I went over. Nobody was home

Police to a drunkard: Where are you going? Man: To listen to a lecture on the ill effects of drinking, on health. Pol: Who'll lecture at Midnite? Man:My wife,.

What is the height of mixed emotions??? when ur mother in law falls from 7th floor on ur mercedes