Q: Why did the scientist install a knocker on his door?A: He wanted to win the No-bell prize.

T'CHER:What do we do with crude oil?S'dent:Teach it some manners

Hello My son won't come to school today,he has fever. Teacher: Oh,who's speaking? Boy: This is my father

What do u call if Bill Gate's mothr gets bored.?BEAT THISAny guess?MOTHERBOARD!Gud nite

Son asks father diff.btw Confidence and Confidential? Dad says- u are my son, i am confident, ur friend is also my son that's Confidential

Tcher: 3 grls are walking in da road. Turn the sentence in to exclamitory. studnt: WOW!

Husband says"When Im gone you'll nevr find another man like me". Wife replied"What makes you think I'd want another man like you?!!!".

Q:There is always a sign board'DRIVE SLOWLY' near school,bt never near girls college.Why? Ans:BECAUSE HERE VEHICLES AUTOMATICALLY GET SLOW!

One day a man inserted an 'advert' in the local classifieds: "Wife wanted". Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."

Dentist: I have to pull the aching tooth, but don't worry it will take just five minutes. Patient: And how much will it cost? Dentist: It's Rs 1000. Patient: One thousand for just a few minutes work??? Dentist: I can extract it very slowly if you like

Man: Whisper those three words that will make me walk on air. Woman: Go hang yourself

Mr A: my wife kisses me every night when I get home. Mr B: mine too, but only 2 c if I have been drinking.