Girl: When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles and lighten your burden. Boy: It’s very kind of you, darling, but I don’t have any worries or troubles. Girl: Well that’s because we aren’t married yet.

Rampa: what is the cost of hair cut?BarbeRs 20Rampa: Then what is the cost of shaving?BarbeRs 10Rampa: Oh! Ok please Shave my head

Wife: You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why? Husband: When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears. Wife: You see, how miraculous and powerful am I for you? Husband: Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, “What other problem can there be greater than this one?”

Wife: Im ashamed of the way we live; papa pays the house rent, my brother sends food and clothing, aunty pays our electric and water bills and my friend Sheela buys us movie tickets.I dont like to complain but now its too much. Husband: U shud be ashamed; uve still got 1 sister and 2 brothers, who dont send us even a single penny.

Why do elephants never forget? Because nobody ever tells them anything

judge-what you do? prisnor-This & that judge-where you live? prisnor-here&there judge(to policeman)-Arrest him. prisnor-when i will come out judge-sooner&later

Man1: I do not want to marry bcoz I m afraid of woman.Man2: Get married soon, then u'll b afraid of only 1 woman n start loving other

Man-i want a divorce. My wife hasnt spoken 2 me for six months now! Judge-better think it over! Wives like that are hard 2 get!

Man Conducting Marketing Survey asked a Lady:"Which Book Has HeLped you most in your Life?"Lady:My Husband's "Cheque Book!"

Q:There is always a sign board'DRIVE SLOWLY' near school,bt never near girls college.Why? Ans:BECAUSE HERE VEHICLES AUTOMATICALLY GET SLOW!

Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.

A lady gave an advertisement in the classifieds : "Husband Wanted". Next day she received a 100 letters. They all said da same thing : "U can have mine"