A Student goes into a library & asks for a book on suicide..! Librarian: "Get lost dude, U won't bring it back.

young girl praying:pls God marry me with intelligent man god replied: thats impossible, because intelligent men don't get married

A police recruit was asked during exam, "What would u do if u had to arrest ur own mother?" He said, "Call for backup."

LAST NIGHT SHE CAME TO MY BED,LAYED ON MY BODY,TOOK LIQUID FROM MY BODY AND GOT SATISFACTION .SHE WAS A MOSQUITO

Dentist: I have to pull the aching tooth, but don't worry it will take just five minutes. Patient: And how much will it cost? Dentist: It's Rs 1000. Patient: One thousand for just a few minutes work??? Dentist: I can extract it very slowly if you like

A lady had 8 sons all named KEVIN, when asked how she differentiates while calling, she replied “by their surname”.

Wife was teaching English Grammar to her husband. Wife- 'I am Beautiful.' Which tense is this? Husband- Past Tense.-

Man: God, how long is a million years to you? God: A second. Man: How much is $ 1 Million to you? God: A cent. Man: Can I borrow a cent? God: Wait a second. =)

What do you call a letter delivered from a chimney? A. Black mail

Technical question: Where u can find mangoes? ...no it is nt in mango tree ..shop?no wrong.. Ans: where WOMENgoes there MANgoes

I went to see the doctor who said, just be a little patient.

Teachefour beautiful ladies r walking on the road. Change it to Exclamatory sentence... Student: WOW!.