Teacher:I wish you would pay a little attention!Student:I'm paying as little as I can sir

A girl phoned me the other day and said..."Come on over, there's nobody home." I went over. Nobody was home

Teachefour beautiful ladies r walking on the road. Change it to Exclamatory sentence... Student: WOW!.

Wife: You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why? Husband: When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears. Wife: You see, how miraculous and powerful am I for you? Husband: Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, “What other problem can there be greater than this one?”

TEACHER : Now, PAPPU, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating ? PAPPU: No sir, I don’t have to, my mom is a good cook.

FATHEHow r ur grades, son?SON: Under water, Dad.FATHEUnder water? What do u mean?SON: They're below C level.

Doctor implants New Ear 2 a man Man: "U fraud,U gave me a woman's ear" Doc: It makes no difference Man: "It does,Now I hear everything but understand nothing"

Why do u take your wife 2 night clubs only?Laloo-By the time she gets ready no othr place is open

Teacher:What was the first think Akbar did on ascending to the throne?Student:Well,he sat down

Man: God, how long is a million years to you? God: A second. Man: How much is $ 1 Million to you? God: A cent. Man: Can I borrow a cent? God: Wait a second. =)

A man phones a mental hospital and asks the receptionist if there is anybody in Room 27 She goes and checks, and comes back to the phone, telling him that the room is empty "Good," says the man. "That means I must have really escaped."

Height of technical thinking... A software person falling from the roof of a building and shouting F1 F1 F1 instead of help help......!!