Hus: Do you know the meaning of WIFE? It is Without Information, Fighting Everytime! WIFE: No darling, its : With Idiot For Ever

Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do? Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes

TEACHER== Name four members of the cat family? STUDENTS== Daddy cat,Mummy cat and two kittens

Wife: Im ashamed of the way we live; papa pays the house rent, my brother sends food and clothing, aunty pays our electric and water bills and my friend Sheela buys us movie tickets.I dont like to complain but now its too much. Husband: U shud be ashamed; uve still got 1 sister and 2 brothers, who dont send us even a single penny.

Teacher:What was the first think Akbar did on ascending to the throne?Student:Well,he sat down

Movie director:in this scene u jump from 10th floor. Actor:what if i die? director:Dats not at all a problem,It"s da last scene

A father to his adopted son "Whats the height of laziness?" Son replied "What more than havin an adopted son.

Doc & engg loved d same girl. Engg before going out of station for a week gave 7 apples to the girl. Why? B'coz an apple a day keeps doctor away

Q: Why did the scientist install a knocker on his door?A: He wanted to win the No-bell prize.

Two friends, who hadn't seen each other in several years, met on the street. "Who are you working for now?" asked the first. "Same people," answered the other. "My wife and four children."

A pregnant lady goes to one swamiji.The swami says when the baby get's delivered the baby's father will die!The lady says "oh thank god, my husband is safe..

What did one magnet say to the other? I find you very attractive.