An AMERICAN couple on african safari. Suddenly a huge lion springs up n seizes d wife wit its giant jaws.. Wife: "Shoot!, shoot for Christ's sake!" Hus: "I can't! I hav run out of film."

Wife: Im ashamed of the way we live; papa pays the house rent, my brother sends food and clothing, aunty pays our electric and water bills and my friend Sheela buys us movie tickets.I dont like to complain but now its too much. Husband: U shud be ashamed; uve still got 1 sister and 2 brothers, who dont send us even a single penny.

Girl: Do U love me?Boy:'Ofcourse darling i do. Girl:Wil U luv me after marriage also? Boy:Tht depends on ur husband. If he allows Me 2 luv u.

santa was looking very sad."Wats d matter,Srdarji?" "I lent Rs. 5Lac to a friend for plastic surgery. Now I dnt know how he looks.."

Height of technical thinking... A software person falling from the roof of a building and shouting F1 F1 F1 instead of help help......!!

Boy- From the day I m ur friend, I m not able to eat, drink or smoke.Girl- how sweet, so u r madly in LOVE with me..!Boy- SHUT UP..!!, U made my pocket empty.

A police recruit was asked during exam, "What would u do if u had to arrest ur own mother?" He said, "Call for backup."

Physics teachr saw boy slepin Askd "Telme da unit f power" Boy woke up n said-"What sir?" Teachr exclaimd"Ok Gud Sit Down!" What=WATT!

He said... Do u love me just coz my father left me a fortune? She said... No stupid, I'd love u no matter who left you the money!

Lady1:"What do u think bout husbands?" Lady2:"They r like OWLS..!" Lady1:"How?"Lady2:"They see good things in their wives only in the night.

A pathan want 2 commit suicide, When asked : Pathan said,my wife ran wid my Best Friend & i can't live widout my friend

I went to see the doctor who said, just be a little patient.