Man runs home shouting pack your bags honey, i just won 10 million in lottery. wife: Do i pack for beach or Resort ? Man : Who cares? just pack and get lost.

Sir:Can ppl tell the future with cards?Sam:My mom can.Sir:Really?Sam:1 look at my report card n she wll tel me wot happens whn dad gets home

Man asks God: Y did u make women so beautiful? God: So that u can luv her. Man: Y did u make her so stupid? God: So that she can luv u...

Wife: Im ashamed of the way we live; papa pays the house rent, my brother sends food and clothing, aunty pays our electric and water bills and my friend Sheela buys us movie tickets.I dont like to complain but now its too much. Husband: U shud be ashamed; uve still got 1 sister and 2 brothers, who dont send us even a single penny.

Little Johnny: Teacher, can I go to the bathroom? TeacheLittle Johnny, MAY I go to the bathroom? Little Johnny: But I asked first!

A lady gave an advertisement in the classifieds : "Husband Wanted". Next day she received a 100 letters. They all said da same thing : "U can have mine"

Teacher: "Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?" jonny: "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day same time."

TeacheHarbhajan is male or female? Student: Female. TeacheHow? Student: Just now commentator told "beautiful delivery by harbajan"

TEACHER : Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.WINNIE : Me!

Two flies order some food in a restaurant. One says: I'll take the shit with garlic. And I'll take the same, but without garlic, said the other one. I don't like to have bad breath.

“Me sick, no work” Boss SMS back: “When I am sick I kiss my wife try it” 2 hours later sardar sms 2 boss: “Me ok, ur wife very sweet”

Tcher: How Old is ur father. Sunny: As old as I m. Tcher: How is it possible? Sunny: He bcom father only after I was born.