Q: What did the gangster's son tell his dad when he failed his examination? A: Dad they questioned me for 3 hours but I never told them anything

Man-i want a divorce. My wife hasnt spoken 2 me for six months now! Judge-better think it over! Wives like that are hard 2 get!

Movie director:in this scene u jump from 10th floor.Actor:what if i die?director:Dats not at all a problem,It"s da last scene

Never Explain Yourself to Anyone Because The person Who Likes U Doesnt Need It. And The Person Who Dislikes U Wont belive it....!!

Girl: Do U love me?Boy:'Ofcourse darling i do. Girl:Wil U luv me after marriage also? Boy:Tht depends on ur husband. If he allows Me 2 luv u.

Reporter: How does it feel to become a millionaire? Millionaire: Sad, because I am not a billionaire.

A Student goes into a library & asks for a book on suicide..! Librarian: "Get lost dude, U won't bring it back.

Srdr : What is the Guarantee for this mirror? Shopkeeper : Put Down from 100 feet of height. The mirror will not Break for the First 99 feets. Srdr:Wow

Sir:B quiet boys!I hav a bad headache Sdent:Why dont u do wot mum Does whn she has a headache?Sir:Whats tht?Sdent:She sends us out to paly

Lady:Is this my train Station Master:No,it belongs to the Railway Company L:Don't try to be funny I mean to ask if I can take this train to Delhi SM:No Madam,Im afraid its too heavy

Husband: Today is sunday & I have to enjoy it. So i bought 3 movie tickets. Wife: why three? Husband: 4 u and ur parents.

Dentist: I have to pull the aching tooth, but don't worry it will take just five minutes. Patient: And how much will it cost? Dentist: It's Rs 1000. Patient: One thousand for just a few minutes work??? Dentist: I can extract it very slowly if you like