A police recruit was asked during exam, "What would u do if u had to arrest ur own mother?" He said, "Call for backup."

Teacher: Now, Johny, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating? Manu: No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook.

Hello My son won't come to school today,he has fever. Teacher: Oh,who's speaking? Boy: This is my father

Police to a drunkard: Where are you going? Man: To listen to a lecture on the ill effects of drinking, on health. Pol: Who'll lecture at Midnite? Man:My wife,.

Wife: You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why? Husband: When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears. Wife: You see, how miraculous and powerful am I for you? Husband: Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, “What other problem can there be greater than this one?”

Teacher:I wish you would pay a little attention!Student:I'm paying as little as I can sir

Teacher : Which is more important to us, the sun or the moon? Pupil: Moon... Teacher : Why? Pupil : The moon gives us light at night when we need it but the sun gives us light only in the day time when we don't need it.

Principal 2 students:U people must sleep atleast 7 hours a day.Students:Impossible sir!College is only for 6 hours!

Boy: Y did Gandhiji have no hair on his head? TeacheIts sign of inteligence Boy: Now i undrstand y girls have so long hair!...

What's the quietest place in the world? The complaint department at the parachute packing plant

Why do bosses prefer round table conferences? So that no1 can corner them.

Santa's wife dies. He is calm, but his wife's lover is crying furiously... Finally, santa consoles him: Don't worry buddy, I will marry again