Teacher : Which is more important to us, the sun or the moon? Pupil: Moon... Teacher : Why? Pupil : The moon gives us light at night when we need it but the sun gives us light only in the day time when we don't need it.
A teacher was asking her class what their fathers did. When she asked young Johnny, he said, "My father's dead, Miss." "Oh, I am sorry, Johnny. In that case, what did he do before he died?" "He went blue and collapsed."
Boss: (to employee) - Experts say humor on the job relieves tension in this time of down-sizing, Knock, Knock. Employee: Who's there? Boss: Not you anymore.
Lady:Is this my train Station Master:No,it belongs to the Railway Company L:Don't try to be funny I mean to ask if I can take this train to Delhi SM:No Madam,Im afraid its too heavy
Patient: Doctor, you must help me. I'm under such a lot of stress. I keep losing my temper with people. Doctor: Tell me about your problem. Patient: I just did, you stupid bastard!