History TeacheFrom where to where did the mughals rule?Student: Sir, I am not sure but I think from page 15 to 26.

Wife: Im ashamed of the way we live; papa pays the house rent, my brother sends food and clothing, aunty pays our electric and water bills and my friend Sheela buys us movie tickets.I dont like to complain but now its too much. Husband: U shud be ashamed; uve still got 1 sister and 2 brothers, who dont send us even a single penny.

What does Santa do after taking a xerox? He compares it with the original for any spelling mistakes.

Q:Why most men prefer to kiss women's lips? Ans:Thats the best & probably the only way to shut a woman's mouth.

Father: What was the hardest thing u learned at college?Son: How to open Beer bottles with teeth...!!

FATHEHow r ur grades, son?SON: Under water, Dad.FATHEUnder water? What do u mean?SON: They're below C level.

Boy: I am not rich like akash, I don't even have a big car like rohit. But I really love you! Girl: I love you too, but tell me more about akash.

FathWhich r d 2 hardest things U learnt in College?Son: Opening Beer botles wth teeth & Lighting Cigarete wth only 1 Match Left In Heavy wind!

Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do? Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes

Q:There is always a sign board'DRIVE SLOWLY' near school,bt never near girls college.Why? Ans:BECAUSE HERE VEHICLES AUTOMATICALLY GET SLOW!

Q: Why are husbands like lawn mowers? A: They're hard to get started, emit foul odors, and don't work half the time!

Q: What did the gangster's son tell his dad when he failed his examination? A: Dad they questioned me for 3 hours but I never told them anything