Wife: Im ashamed of the way we live; papa pays the house rent, my brother sends food and clothing, aunty pays our electric and water bills and my friend Sheela buys us movie tickets.I dont like to complain but now its too much. Husband: U shud be ashamed; uve still got 1 sister and 2 brothers, who dont send us even a single penny.

Reporter: How does it feel to become a millionaire? Millionaire: Sad, because I am not a billionaire.

Wife going to Wife returns. Husband:-where is my gift? Wife:-wait 4 9months. London. Wife:-Do u want anything from England? Husband:-ya... English girl.

Husband to wife: Why do you keep reading our marriage licence? Wife to Husband: I'm looking for a loophole

Police to a drunkard: Where are you going? Man: To listen to a lecture on the ill effects of drinking, on health. Pol: Who'll lecture at Midnite? Man:My wife,.

Son: Mummy, dad is very honest... Mummy: How can u say that..? Son: Simple... He closes one eye whenever he sees any lady passing by...!

Dad: if u Pass in the exam i will Present u 1 Cycle.Son: if i fail?Dad: i will Present 10 Cycle.Son: why?Dad: To Open Cycle Shop.

Q: Why do brides wear white? A: To blend in with everything else in the kitchen.

Whats the height of hope??? A 99 year old lady going for airtel ka naya lifetime scheme.......!!

Young Son: Is it true, Dad, that in some parts of Africa, a Man doesn't know his wife until he marries her? Dad: That happens in every country, son.

Teacher:I wish you would pay a little attention!Student:I'm paying as little as I can sir

Why there are always two cops in a car patrol ? A: In case the siren won't work, one of them to scream "Wouuuu-Wouuuuu" and the other - "Blue, Red, Blue, Red, Blue, Red.."