Teacher:I wish you would pay a little attention!Student:I'm paying as little as I can sir

Customer: Waiter, what's the meaning of this fly in my tea up? Waiter: I wouldn't know sir, I'm a waiter, not a fortune teller.

Son asks father diff.btw Confidence and Confidential? Dad says- u are my son, i am confident, ur friend is also my son that's Confidential

Do you believe that getting married on a Friday brings bad luck ? "Of course, why would Friday be an exception?"

Q: Why did the scientist install a knocker on his door?A: He wanted to win the No-bell prize.

Dentist: I have to pull the aching tooth, but don't worry it will take just five minutes. Patient: And how much will it cost? Dentist: It's Rs 1000. Patient: One thousand for just a few minutes work??? Dentist: I can extract it very slowly if you like

Man asks God: Y did u make women so beautiful? God: So that u can luv her. Man: Y did u make her so stupid? God: So that she can luv u...

TEACHER : Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.WINNIE : Me!

A Student goes into a library & asks for a book on suicide..! Librarian: "Get lost dude, U won't bring it back.

A pathan want 2 commit suicide, When asked : Pathan said,my wife ran wid my Best Friend & i can't live widout my friend

A company held a contest for kids with the theme: "The nicest thing My Father Ever Did For Me." One kid answered "He married my mother."

Tcher: 3 grls are walking in da road. Turn the sentence in to exclamitory. studnt: WOW!