Why do u take your wife 2 night clubs only?Laloo-By the time she gets ready no othr place is open

LAST NIGHT SHE CAME TO MY BED,LAYED ON MY BODY,TOOK LIQUID FROM MY BODY AND GOT SATISFACTION .SHE WAS A MOSQUITO

Man: Whisper those three words that will make me walk on air. Woman: Go hang yourself

A lady had 8 sons all named KEVIN, when asked how she differentiates while calling, she replied “by their surname”.

Girl: Will you love me after marriage also? Boy: This depends on your husband, if he allows me.

A cop stops a drunk man and asks: Where you going? I'm going to listen the lecture about the harm of the drunkenness and alcoholism. At night? And who will give a lecture?My wife and mother-in-law!

TeacheHarbhajan is male or female? Student: Female. TeacheHow? Student: Just now commentator told "beautiful delivery by harbajan"

What did one magnet say to the other? I find you very attractive.

Movie director:in this scene u jump from 10th floor.Actor:what if i die?director:Dats not at all a problem,It"s da last scene

Wife: Im ashamed of the way we live; papa pays the house rent, my brother sends food and clothing, aunty pays our electric and water bills and my friend Sheela buys us movie tickets.I dont like to complain but now its too much. Husband: U shud be ashamed; uve still got 1 sister and 2 brothers, who dont send us even a single penny.

Hello My son won't come to school today,he has fever. Teacher: Oh,who's speaking? Boy: This is my father

2 sardar soldiers captured a pakistani, gave him dice & said, if u get 1,2,3,4,5 V'll kill u! paki asks: 6 aya to? sardars: Then, throw again..