Man receives telegram: Wife dead-should be buried or cremated? Man: Don't take any chances. Burn the body and bury the ash.

Wife: Im ashamed of the way we live; papa pays the house rent, my brother sends food and clothing, aunty pays our electric and water bills and my friend Sheela buys us movie tickets.I dont like to complain but now its too much. Husband: U shud be ashamed; uve still got 1 sister and 2 brothers, who dont send us even a single penny.

Frnd1: u have married with 1 of the twin sisters, how do u recognize ur wife? Frnd2: why should I ? : )

when u kiss an american girl she says kiss me hard,when u kiss a british girl she say kiss me slow,but when u kiss an indian girl she says kisay nu na dasi

Can I go to the theatre? Asks a mosquito ot her mother. "yes but be aware, pay attention during the applause."

A teacher was asking her class what their fathers did. When she asked young Johnny, he said, "My father's dead, Miss." "Oh, I am sorry, Johnny. In that case, what did he do before he died?" "He went blue and collapsed."

Q: If a devil catches your wife, what would you do?A: You can do nothing. if devil has committed a mistake let him face the consequences.

A boy saw a Beautiful Gal. He went & kissed her... GAL : "Stupid...! What're U doing...??" boy : "B Com final year...And U ??"

Devdas’s matrimonial ad- Wanted wife. Age no bar! Height No bar! Luks no bar! Caste No Bar! But gal’s father shoul have his own Bar.

Doctor implants New Ear 2 a man Man: "U fraud,U gave me a woman's ear" Doc: It makes no difference Man: "It does,Now I hear everything but understand nothing"

I went to see the doctor who said, just be a little patient.

A cop stops a drunk man and asks: Where you going? I'm going to listen the lecture about the harm of the drunkenness and alcoholism. At night? And who will give a lecture?My wife and mother-in-law!