somu:mobile bill kitna hai? Callcentre gal:just dial 123 to knw ur current bill status. somu:abe Stupid current ka nahi mobile ka.

Sardar to Mali : Go and water the garden. Mali : It's raining outside. Sardar : Bloody don't give excuses. Take umbrella and go.

Teacher: Johny, how do you spell "crocodile"? Manu: "K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L" Teacher: No, that's wrong Manu: Maybe it's wrong, but you ask me how I spell it!

Judge to accused: Have you anything to offer before I pass sentence on you?Accused: No, Your Honour. My lawyer took my last dollar.

Husband says"When Im gone you'll nevr find another man like me". Wife replied"What makes you think I'd want another man like you?!!!".

Man1: I do not want to marry bcoz I m afraid of woman.Man2: Get married soon, then u'll b afraid of only 1 woman n start loving other

Teen boy:Dad I want to be like Ghandhiji Dad:Good why not..!Boy:Thanx Dad so lets start with marriage as Gandhiji were married at age of 14

TEACHER== Name four members of the cat family? STUDENTS== Daddy cat,Mummy cat and two kittens

Guide: I welcome u all to the Niagra falls. These are the world s largest Waterfalls and the sound intensity of the Waterfall is so high, sound of even 20 supersonic planes passing cant be heard! Now may I request the ladies to keep quiet so that we can hear the Niagra falls??

Wife: Im ashamed of the way we live; papa pays the house rent, my brother sends food and clothing, aunty pays our electric and water bills and my friend Sheela buys us movie tickets.I dont like to complain but now its too much. Husband: U shud be ashamed; uve still got 1 sister and 2 brothers, who dont send us even a single penny.

A guy told his friend, “My father’s name is laughing and my mother’s name is smiling.” So the friend asks, “Is your name kidding?” The guy says, “That’s my brother’s name and I am joking.”

when u kiss an american girl she says kiss me hard,when u kiss a british girl she say kiss me slow,but when u kiss an indian girl she says kisay nu na dasi