A woman was sitting at a bar when a man approached her and said, Hi, sweetie! Want a little company? Woman: Why? Do u have one to sell???

The two partners in a law firm were having lunch when suddenly one of them jumped up from the table and said, "I have to go back to the office. I forgot to lock the safe!" "What are you worried about?" the other said. "We're both here."

What did one magnet say to the other? I find you very attractive.

Gal: Do u have any sentimental love cards? Shopkeeper: How about this card, it says 'To the only boy I ever loved' Gal: Great! I want 10 of them.

Wife: Im ashamed of the way we live; papa pays the house rent, my brother sends food and clothing, aunty pays our electric and water bills and my friend Sheela buys us movie tickets.I dont like to complain but now its too much. Husband: U shud be ashamed; uve still got 1 sister and 2 brothers, who dont send us even a single penny.

Somu:2day my pocket got picked but my wif saved me raj:Did she catch d thief? Somu:No man!She often removes most of d cash frm my Pocket

judge-what you do? prisnor-This & that judge-where you live? prisnor-here&there judge(to policeman)-Arrest him. prisnor-when i will come out judge-sooner&later

T'CHER:What do we do with crude oil?S'dent:Teach it some manners

Mr A: my wife kisses me every night when I get home. Mr B: mine too, but only 2 c if I have been drinking.

Elephant &Ant were walking on a bridgeThen D elephant lookd down 2the river Sudenly ant Bited D elephant.Why?Bcoz ants wife was bathing in D river.

A cop stops a drunk man and asks: Where you going? I'm going to listen the lecture about the harm of the drunkenness and alcoholism. At night? And who will give a lecture?My wife and mother-in-law!

Q:Define a true music lover? Ans: a girl is singing in bathroom while taking bath & a boy near the keyhole is using his ears & not his eyes.