Judge to accused:

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Judge to accused:
Judge to accused: Have you anything to offer before I pass sentence on you?Accused: No, Your Honour. My lawyer took my last dollar.
  
Jan, 17 2012     131 chars (1 sms)     984 views       Jokes > English Jokes

more English Jokes SMS Messages

A lady had 8 sons
A lady had 8 sons all named KEVIN, when asked how she differentiates while calling, she replied “by their surname”.
FATHEHow r ur
FATHEHow r ur grades, son?SON: Under water, Dad.FATHEUnder water? What do u mean?SON: They're below C level.
Author: "I'm convinced
Author: "I'm convinced that the publishers have a conspiracy against me." Friend: "What makes you think so?" Author: "Ten of them have refused the same story."
Santa's wife dies.
Santa's wife dies. He is calm, but his wife's lover is crying furiously... Finally, santa consoles him: Don't worry buddy, I will marry again
Man1: I do not
Man1: I do not want to marry bcoz I m afraid of woman.Man2: Get married soon, then u'll b afraid of only 1 woman n start loving other
Men who have
Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
A police recruit was
A police recruit was asked during exam, "What would u do if u had to arrest ur own mother?" He said, "Call for backup."
Husband says"When
Husband says"When Im gone you'll nevr find another man like me". Wife replied"What makes you think I'd want another man like you?!!!".
WIFE : " I wish I
WIFE : " I wish I was a newspaper, so I'd be in ur hands all day." HUSBAND : " I too wish that u were a newspaper, so I could have a new one
Two men are
Two men are discussing their lives. One says, "I'm getting married. I'm tired of a messy apartment, dirty dishes, and no clothes to wear." The other one says, "I'm getting divorced for the same reasons."
Man Conducting Marketing
Man Conducting Marketing Survey asked a Lady:"Which Book Has HeLped you most in your Life?"Lady:My Husband's "Cheque Book!"
Question Girl :
Question Girl : Do you love me ? Boy : Yes Dear Girl : Would you die for me ? Boy : No, mine is undying love!

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