Customer: Waiter, what's the meaning of this fly in my tea up? Waiter: I wouldn't know sir, I'm a waiter, not a fortune teller.

Guide: I welcome u all to the Niagra falls. These are the world s largest Waterfalls and the sound intensity of the Waterfall is so high, sound of even 20 supersonic planes passing cant be heard! Now may I request the ladies to keep quiet so that we can hear the Niagra falls??

Sam to Ram:Did U kill mosquitoes?Yes.But why they still bite me at night?They must be widows of the dead ones.

humne suna hai ishq mein ratoin ki neend udda jati hai plzzzzzzz koi humse bhi ishq karo hume ratoin ko neend bahut aati hai.

A boy saw a Beautiful Gal. He went & kissed her... GAL : "Stupid...! What're U doing...??" boy : "B Com final year...And U ??"

TEACHER : “George Washington not only chopped down his father’s Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn’t punish him?” PAPPU : “Because George still had the axe in his hand?”

Technical question: Where u can find mangoes? ...no it is nt in mango tree ..shop?no wrong.. Ans: where WOMENgoes there MANgoes

Boy: Mummy, if I failed in this exam I'll commite suicide.Mothe'Shut up! Never say that. If U try to do so I'll just kill you..

Girl: Will you love me after marriage also? Boy: This depends on your husband, if he allows me.

Srdr : What is the Guarantee for this mirror? Shopkeeper : Put Down from 100 feet of height. The mirror will not Break for the First 99 feets. Srdr:Wow

Sardar to Mali : Go and water the garden. Mali : It's raining outside. Sardar : Bloody don't give excuses. Take umbrella and go.

Dentist: I have to pull the aching tooth, but don't worry it will take just five minutes. Patient: And how much will it cost? Dentist: It's Rs 1000. Patient: One thousand for just a few minutes work??? Dentist: I can extract it very slowly if you like