Man runs home shouting pack your bags honey, i just won 10 million in lottery. wife: Do i pack for beach or Resort ? Man : Who cares? just pack and get lost.

A drunk was hauled into court. "Mister," the judge began, "You ve been brought here for drinking." "Great," the drunk exclaimed." When do we get started?"…

indian- i have 4 sister n 3 brothers what abt u? American-i hav no sis or no bro but i hav 4 moms frm 1st dad n 5 dads frm my 1st mom

Teacher : Which is more important to us, the sun or the moon? Pupil: Moon... Teacher : Why? Pupil : The moon gives us light at night when we need it but the sun gives us light only in the day time when we don't need it.

After a lengthy quarrel, a wife said to her husband, "You know, I was a fool when I married you." The husband replied: "Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice it."

Guide: I welcome u all to the Niagra falls. These are the world s largest Waterfalls and the sound intensity of the Waterfall is so high, sound of even 20 supersonic planes passing cant be heard! Now may I request the ladies to keep quiet so that we can hear the Niagra falls??

First Lady-"If you dont love your husband why dont you divorce him???"2nd Lady-Oh I hate him so much that I dont want to see him haappy

Wife: You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why? Husband: When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears. Wife: You see, how miraculous and powerful am I for you? Husband: Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, “What other problem can there be greater than this one?”

A father to his adopted son "Whats the height of laziness?" Son replied "What more than havin an adopted son.

Boy: Mummy, if I failed in this exam I'll commite suicide.Mothe'Shut up! Never say that. If U try to do so I'll just kill you..

Son: Dad, what is an idiot? Dad: An idiot is a person who tries to explain his ideas in such a strange and long way that another person who is listening to him can't understand him. Do you understand me? Son: No.

Father: What was the hardest thing u learned at college?Son: How to open Beer bottles with teeth...!!