Stress is when you wake up and realises that you haven't slept yet.

A student asked 2 write a signboard 4 d traffic rules near college campushe wrote;"Drive carefully! Don't kill students, wait for teachers"

Sir:Bijli Kaha Se Aati Hai?Banta: Mama K Ghar Se.Sir:Wo Kaise?Bnta: KyuKi Jab B Bijli Jati Hai Papa Kahte Hai Saalo Ne fir kaat di!

sharab hai to mai-khane banee, husna hai to dewane banee, ap me bhe koi khaas baat hai tabhe to pagalkhane banee

1 drunk asked the other:What a beautiful night,look at the moon.Other drunk: U are wrong,thats not the moon,that s the sun.Both started arguing for a while when they saw another drunk walking; they stopped him,Sir,pls help settle our argument?Tell us what is that up in the sky that s shining.Is it the moon or the sun?3rd man looked at the sky and said,Sorry, I dont live around here.

Difference between a man buying a lottery and a man arguing with his wife? A: A man buying a lottery has a chance to win!

How can one reduce consumption of alchol? Before marriage drink only on days when u r sad, After marriage drink only on days when u r happy.

To live a life, one needs brains, reflex, perception, looks, IQ, knowledge, way of expressions and many more mental qualities... Hats off to u bcoz u manage 2 live without them !!!

Whats Karan Johar up to?K3G: Love ur parents.KHNH: Love ur neighbors.KANK: Luv others wife.& nowDostana: Love the Same Gender!

How do you express two words,with exactly the opposite meanings,in a single sentence...?Any guesses?No?Say:"HAPPILY MARRIED"

an IDEA can change ur life..... but DOCKOMO can change ur wife

How to develop positive thinking?Ans: Watch F-TV b'coz u always think arey yaar...ok..thek hai...ye nahi to agli model ke kapde mai se kuch jaroor dikhega.