What do you call a letter delivered from a chimney? A. Black mail

Patient: Doctor, you must help me. I'm under such a lot of stress. I keep losing my temper with people. Doctor: Tell me about your problem. Patient: I just did, you stupid bastard!

Why r Egyptian children always confused? Because after death their daddy becomes Mummy

Dad:Why aren't you doing well in history?Pappu:Because the Teacher keeps on asking things that happened before my birth

What is the height of mixed emotions??? when ur mother in law falls from 7th floor on ur mercedes

TEACHER : Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?SIMON : No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.

Boy- From the day I m ur friend, I m not able to eat, drink or smoke.Girl- how sweet, so u r madly in LOVE with me..!Boy- SHUT UP..!!, U made my pocket empty.

Commerce professor asks the student: what is the most important source of finance for starting business? Student: "Father in law".

*A young accountant stayed late at the office day after day. Finally, the boss called him in and asked for an explanation. "Well, you see sir," he stammered, "my wife works, too-- and if I get home before she does, I have to cook the dinner."

Doctor implants New Ear 2 a man Man: "U fraud,U gave me a woman's ear" Doc: It makes no difference Man: "It does,Now I hear everything but understand nothing"

Teache"Where is Himalaya?"Student: "Madam, I dont know."Teache"Dont know?? Stand on the desk."Student: "I still cant see.

Doctor to lady: U look exactly like my 3rd wife. Lady: How many wife do u have? Docto2.