Mr A: my wife kisses me every night when I get home. Mr B: mine too, but only 2 c if I have been drinking.

What is D diff. betwn a Secretary&a Personal Secretary? Secretary says,"Good Morning Sir"&Personal Secretary says,"Oh my God!Its morninG sir.

Man-i want a divorce. My wife hasnt spoken 2 me for six months now! Judge-better think it over! Wives like that are hard 2 get!

Mr.bean said to his GirlFriend"I luv u"& fell down. Again Told"I luv u"&fell down.Girl: y u r doing like this? Mr.bean: I am falling in love

Sir:G.Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree,but also admitted doing it. Now,kid, do you know why his father didn't punish him?"kid:Because George still had the axe in his hand.

Teache Give An example to use neither-nor. Boy: When girls wear tight fittings, neither they are comfortable nor we are comfortable…

A little kid asks his Dad, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" "No idea," replied the Father, "I'm still paying for it..."

Gal: Do u have any sentimental love cards? Shopkeeper: How about this card, it says 'To the only boy I ever loved' Gal: Great! I want 10 of them.

Wife: Im ashamed of the way we live; papa pays the house rent, my brother sends food and clothing, aunty pays our electric and water bills and my friend Sheela buys us movie tickets.I dont like to complain but now its too much. Husband: U shud be ashamed; uve still got 1 sister and 2 brothers, who dont send us even a single penny.

Patient: Doctor, you must help me. I'm under such a lot of stress. I keep losing my temper with people. Doctor: Tell me about your problem. Patient: I just did, you stupid bastard!

History Teacher : From where to where did the mughals rule ? Student: Sir, I am not sure but I think from page 15 to 26.

FathWhich r d 2 hardest things U learnt in College?Son: Opening Beer botles wth teeth & Lighting Cigarete wth only 1 Match Left In Heavy wind!