Doctor, doctor, will i be able to play the violin after the operation?" "yes of course...." "Great ! i never could before"

Young Son: Is it true, Dad, that in some parts of Africa, a Man doesn't know his wife until he marries her? Dad: That happens in every country, son.

Wife was teaching English Grammar to her husband. Wife- 'I am Beautiful.' Which tense is this? Husband- Past Tense.-

Hello My son won't come to school today,he has fever. Teacher: Oh,who's speaking? Boy: This is my father

There was this lover who said that he would go through hell for her. They got married - now he is going through Hell!!!

Stalking into a police station late one night, a man demands to speak to the burglar who broke into his home. "Sorry,that's against the rule," says the desk sergeant."You didn't get it," says the man."I need to know how he got in without waking my wife."

Man asks God: Y did u make women so beautiful? God: So that u can luv her. Man: Y did u make her so stupid? God: So that she can luv u...

Two flies order some food in a restaurant. One says: I'll take the shit with garlic. And I'll take the same, but without garlic, said the other one. I don't like to have bad breath.

Hus: Do you know the meaning of WIFE? It is Without Information, Fighting Everytime! WIFE: No darling, its : With Idiot For Ever

Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.

Man: Whisper those three words that will make me walk on air. Woman: Go hang yourself

Q: Why are husbands like lawn mowers? A: They're hard to get started, emit foul odors, and don't work half the time!