Devdas’s matrimonial ad- Wanted wife. Age no bar! Height No bar! Luks no bar! Caste No Bar! But gal’s father shoul have his own Bar.

A lady gave an advertisement in the classifieds : "Husband Wanted". Next day she received a 100 letters. They all said da same thing : "U can have mine"

I bought my wife a new car. She called and said, "There was water in the carburetor." I asked her, "Where's the car?" She replied,. In the lake."

Technical question: Where u can find mangoes? ...no it is nt in mango tree ..shop?no wrong.. Ans: where WOMENgoes there MANgoes

Doctor to lady: U look exactly like my 3rd wife. Lady: How many wife do u have? Docto2.

2 sardar soldiers captured a pakistani, gave him dice & said, if u get 1,2,3,4,5 V'll kill u! paki asks: 6 aya to? sardars: Then, throw again..

The two partners in a law firm were having lunch when suddenly one of them jumped up from the table and said, "I have to go back to the office. I forgot to lock the safe!" "What are you worried about?" the other said. "We're both here."

Hello My son won't come to school today,he has fever. Teacher: Oh,who's speaking? Boy: This is my father

Dentist: I have to pull the aching tooth, but don't worry it will take just five minutes. Patient: And how much will it cost? Dentist: It's Rs 1000. Patient: One thousand for just a few minutes work??? Dentist: I can extract it very slowly if you like

Honey, when we get married, I'll be there to share all your troubles and sorrows." "But I don't have any, my love." "I said, when we get married"

Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.

Boy- From the day I m ur friend, I m not able to eat, drink or smoke.Girl- how sweet, so u r madly in LOVE with me..!Boy- SHUT UP..!!, U made my pocket empty.