A Student goes into a library & asks for a book on suicide..! Librarian: "Get lost dude, U won't bring it back.

Boy: Y did Gandhiji have no hair on his head? TeacheIts sign of inteligence Boy: Now i undrstand y girls have so long hair!...

Son: Dad, what is an idiot? Dad: An idiot is a person who tries to explain his ideas in such a strange and long way that another person who is listening to him can't understand him. Do you understand me? Son: No.

Wife: Why are you home so early? Husband: My boss told me to go to hell.

Guide: I welcome u all to the Niagra falls. These are the world s largest Waterfalls and the sound intensity of the Waterfall is so high, sound of even 20 supersonic planes passing cant be heard! Now may I request the ladies to keep quiet so that we can hear the Niagra falls??

Stalking into a police station late one night, a man demands to speak to the burglar who broke into his home. "Sorry,that's against the rule," says the desk sergeant."You didn't get it," says the man."I need to know how he got in without waking my wife."

FATHEHow r ur grades, son?SON: Under water, Dad.FATHEUnder water? What do u mean?SON: They're below C level.

Boy- From the day I m ur friend, I m not able to eat, drink or smoke.Girl- how sweet, so u r madly in LOVE with me..!Boy- SHUT UP..!!, U made my pocket empty.

Lady1:"What do u think bout husbands?" Lady2:"They r like OWLS..!" Lady1:"How?"Lady2:"They see good things in their wives only in the night.

Tcher: How Old is ur father. Sunny: As old as I m. Tcher: How is it possible? Sunny: He bcom father only after I was born.

History Teacher : From where to where did the mughals rule ? Student: Sir, I am not sure but I think from page 15 to 26.

A father to his adopted son "Whats the height of laziness?" Son replied "What more than havin an adopted son.