A man went to the police station wishing to speak with the burglar who had broken into his house the night before. “You’ll get your chance in court,” said the desk sergeant. “No, no, no!”, said the man. “I want to know how he got into the house without waking my wife. I’ve been trying to do that for years!”

Man Conducting Marketing Survey asked a Lady:"Which Book Has HeLped you most in your Life?"Lady:My Husband's "Cheque Book!"

Honey, when we get married, I'll be there to share all your troubles and sorrows." "But I don't have any, my love." "I said, when we get married"

Man: Whisper those three words that will make me walk on air. Woman: Go hang yourself

Frnd1: u have married with 1 of the twin sisters, how do u recognize ur wife? Frnd2: why should I ? : )

judge-what you do? prisnor-This & that judge-where you live? prisnor-here&there judge(to policeman)-Arrest him. prisnor-when i will come out judge-sooner&later

Dad: if u Pass in the exam i will Present u 1 Cycle.Son: if i fail?Dad: i will Present 10 Cycle.Son: why?Dad: To Open Cycle Shop.

Tcher: How Old is ur father. Sunny: As old as I m. Tcher: How is it possible? Sunny: He bcom father only after I was born.

Little Johnny: Teacher, can I go to the bathroom? TeacheLittle Johnny, MAY I go to the bathroom? Little Johnny: But I asked first!

Teacher: Johny, how do you spell "crocodile"? Manu: "K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L" Teacher: No, that's wrong Manu: Maybe it's wrong, but you ask me how I spell it!

Technical question: Where u can find mangoes? ...no it is nt in mango tree ..shop?no wrong.. Ans: where WOMENgoes there MANgoes

Why does history keep repeating it self? Because we weren't listening the first time !