When u feel sad.... To cheer up just go to the mirror and say, "damn I am really so cute" u will overcome your sadness. But don't make this a habit..... Coz liars go to hell !!!!

WHY INDIA IS IN TROUBLE...POPULATION :100 CR. RETIRED =9 CR. CENTRAL GOVT=17CR. STATE GOVT=30 CR(BOTH DONT WORK).I.T. Professional =1 cr. (dont work for india).In school = 25 cr.under 5 yr.age= 1 cr. Unemployed= 15 cr.In hospital= 1.2 cr.Statics u find 7999998 person any time in jail.Then balance 2 r U me . U R BUSY IN PHILOSOPICAL THINKING. How can I handle INDIA ALONE?

1 drunk asked the other:What a beautiful night,look at the moon.Other drunk: U are wrong,thats not the moon,that s the sun.Both started arguing for a while when they saw another drunk walking; they stopped him,Sir,pls help settle our argument?Tell us what is that up in the sky that s shining.Is it the moon or the sun?3rd man looked at the sky and said,Sorry, I dont live around here.

One american boy giving interview 4 admission in school. Madam asks who is ur father? His mother says: please ask simple questions madam!

CHUHE NE SHERNI KO PROPOSE KIYA...ShErNi: AbEy aPNi SuRaT DeKhi hAi AaiNe mE..?ChUah: Are PagLi SuRaT Pe MaT Ja, CoNfiDeNcE To DeKh!!!

Student scared of a thrashing bcz of poor marks did not go home and joind royal challengers bangalore! Why??Bcz they dont beat anyone.

Husband sitting near to his wife n she was driving,Husband:please slow down the speed of car.Wife:No ;please. No; please NopleaseNopls..Husband:the Newspaper ill publish ur correct Age 55 in case of axident; Ohh KHkhkhkhkhkh…

Ansu aap ka Niklaa aur Aankhen maree hoo, Dil aap ka Dharkay aur Dharken maree hoo, Khuda kare Hamra Payar Itnaa Gharaa hoo, JOB aap karaa aur INCOME maree hoo.

Ab tak meri life ek khuli bottle thi, Jisme se sab perfume ki tarha udd jata tha. Par aap ke aane se sab kuch ruk gaya. Bhagwan kare aap jaisa DHAKKAN sabko mile!!!

Tum haste raho, nachte raho, muskurate raho, sada khil khilate raho, khush raho aur gungunate raho, mera kya hai, log tumhe hi pagal samzhenge....

Like energy, love can neither be created nor destroyed. It can just be transferred from one girlfriend to another girlfriend

If Reliance group launches a diaper,what will b d slogan? Ab kar lo susu chaddi me!! Dhirubhai ka sapna,har langot me diaper apna..