1 drunk asked the other:What a beautiful night,look at the moon.Other drunk: U are wrong,thats not the moon,that s the sun.Both started arguing for a while when they saw another drunk walking; they stopped him,Sir,pls help settle our argument?Tell us what is that up in the sky that s shining.Is it the moon or the sun?3rd man looked at the sky and said,Sorry, I dont live around here.

Wife hints 2 husband 4 a new car & say,"Dear, buy me somethng that goes 0 to 80 in 3 secs when i'm on it."Husband gifted her a Weighing Machine..

Duniya mein bewafai aam baat hai,Ab Sooraj ko hi dekh lo niklta Roshni ke saath hai,Rehta Kiran ke saath hai,Aur jaata Sandhya ke saath hai....

Ek pal me kabhi ye duniya simat jati hai to kabhi bikhar jati hai. ek pal me jindgi chal pdti hai to kabhi tham jati hai. ek pal me hansati hai to kabhi rulati hai aur kabhi to ek pal me zindgi ke sare mayane samjha jati hai.

SITUATIONAL MESSAGE- ''Everyone wants to go to Heaven but no one wants to die..." "Boley to....... Sab ko top karna hai par padhna koi nahi chahta".

Ek Admi Chupke Se Nark Se Swarg Me Ghus Gaya,Farishto Ne Use Khub Mara,Wo Utha, Kapde Zade Or Bola Isi Harkat k Karan Koi Swarg Me Nai Ata.!

Darde dil me gam ki kaliya khilti hai, aab to tanhai aaksar hamse milti hai, aapne band kiya jabse SMS karna, MOBILE ki battery jyada chalti hai!

We cannot grant you a life insurance policy because you are already 102 years old. “I do not understand. It is proven statistically that at that age only few people die.”

5 reasons why I like u. 1-u r never boring. 2-u know how 2 bring a smile on my face. 3-u r always on my side 4-u r perfect 5-u r always fooled by me.

Jis tarha heere ko heera katta hai… Sone ko sona katta hai…Lohe ko loha katta hai.. Theek usi tarha dekh lena ek din.. Tumhe kutta katega…

I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home which anser the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog which growls every morning, a parrot which swears all afternoon and a cat that comes home late at night.

Man at medical shop: I need poison.Chemist: I can't sell u that.Man shows wife's photo.Chemist: Oh! Sorry, I didn't know u had a prescription.