Man b4 marage: Roses r red, Violets r blue believe it or not im mad 4u. After marage Roses r dead,im blue u make me mad some day ill kill u.

God:I cant be everywhere so i created Mother!!Evil:I too cant b everywhere so i created Mother-in-Law

Paani Aane Ki Baat Karte Ho, Dil Jalane Ki Baat Karte Ho. 4 Din Se Muhe Nahi Doya, Tum Nahane Ki Baat Karte Ho.

Man at medical shop: I need poison.Chemist: I can't sell u that.Man shows wife's photo.Chemist: Oh! Sorry, I didn't know u had a prescription.

The best way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once

If u r stressed, you"ll get pimples.. if u cry,u"ll get wrinkles.. So, y don"t u smile & get dimples?"""

Guide: Welcome 2 Niagra falls. Sound intensity is so high dat even 20 supersonic jets cant b heard. Now may i requst d ladies 2 b silent so we can hear d falls

1 drunk asked the other:What a beautiful night,look at the moon.Other drunk: U are wrong,thats not the moon,that s the sun.Both started arguing for a while when they saw another drunk walking; they stopped him,Sir,pls help settle our argument?Tell us what is that up in the sky that s shining.Is it the moon or the sun?3rd man looked at the sky and said,Sorry, I dont live around here.

Class rooms are like Train:1st 2 benches r Executive coaches- Reservd 4 VIP!Middle 2 r General cmprtmnt! &Last 2 are Sleeper class!!

Behind every successful student there isa girl friend... But,what about unsuccessful student ?Lots ofgirl friends...!

In a park two lovers eating chips by lookin into each other eyes. Girl: dear wht r u thinking at this moment? Boy:I think u r eating more chips than me.

Wife-I wish I was a newspaper so I'd be in ur hands all day. Husband-I too wish d same, so I could have a new 1 everyday