I am a killer

I am a killer
I am a killer, I kill people for money. But because you are my friend, I'll kill you for nothing
  

Jan, 13 2012     96 chars (1 sms)     1917 views       Funny

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We cannot grant you a life insurance policy because you are already 102 years old. “I do not understand. It is proven statistically that at that age only few people die.”
Unmarried girl got pregnant went to insurance office for claim.Officer:ur policy covers sickness,accident,not pregnancy.Girl: it was an accident
karo shri ganpati bapa ke darshan papiyon ko nahin dikhte!
Kash Life aisi hoti yaar .MONday ko dosti Tueday ko ikrar.WED ko pyar Thrs.ko intzar. Fri ko SHADI .SAT ko TALAK .Sun rest Monday neXT
U r d 1 whos so smart,U r d 1 whos so charming, U r the one whose so caring,U r the one whose so good looking. And, I'm the one who is spreading these rumors.
Ladki ek aisi paheli hai, kabhi teri to kabhi meri saheli hai. Kharcha karo to bole "darling, how are you?". Na karo to bole "brother, who are you?".
Paani Aane Ki Baat Karte Ho, Dil Jalane Ki Baat Karte Ho. 4 Din Se Muhe Nahi Doya, Tum Nahane Ki Baat Karte Ho.
Most peoplehave 5 senses.Some peoplehave 6 senses.But u r blessedwith 7 senses.An extra senseisNON SENSE
Behind every successful student there isa girl friend... But,what about unsuccessful student ?Lots ofgirl friends...!
Old people used to annoy me at weddings, pinching my cheeks saying you are next. They stopped that when I started doing the same to them at Funerals!!!
Kabhi Kehta Tha Dost Hamara Ek Jaan Bhi Maango To Hazir Hai Aaj Apni GF Ko Jaan Kehta Hai, Aur Maango To Inkaar Karta Hai
Kayamat ke din farishtene sabse kaha,"es papar per apane-apane gunah likho."achanak tumari aavaj aayi"Sir,sapliment please.