God:I cant be everywhere so i created Mother!!Evil:I too cant b everywhere so i created Mother-in-Law

A man in US kicks a dog to death which was abt to bite a lady.Paper reports:US citizen saves lady frm dog.Man says I'm not U.S citizen.So reprt changd,foreign hero saves lady frm dogMan says he is frm Pak Nxt days headlines:Terorist attacks local dog.

Nurse: A beautiful woman who holds your hand for one full minute and then expects your pulse to be normal.

At marriage function, old ppl usd 2 pull my cheeks & say "U R NEXT"Nw they stopped it.U knw y? B coz I startd doing d same at funerals!

When a Man Opens the Door of His Car for His Wife, You Can Be Sure of 0ne Thing : Either the Car is NEW or the Wife.

Help a man when he is in trouble and he will remember you when he is in trouble again.

Chandni raat thi,nadi ka kinara tha,asman me taro ka nazara tha,premi ne pyar se muskarate hue premika se kaha..."Darling..beedi piogi

Apne Teacherz Ki Bohat Respect KijiyeKyon KKyon K Is Duniya Mai Murghi K Elawa Wo Wahid Personality HainJo Ap Ko Anda De Sakti hain

A student attached a Rs 100 note on his test paper and wrote,"Rs 1 for 1 point."Next day he got his paper back and Rs 56 in change

All tragedies are finished by a death.. All comedies are finished by a marriage..

WHY INDIA IS IN TROUBLE...POPULATION :100 CR. RETIRED =9 CR. CENTRAL GOVT=17CR. STATE GOVT=30 CR(BOTH DONT WORK).I.T. Professional =1 cr. (dont work for india).In school = 25 cr.under 5 yr.age= 1 cr. Unemployed= 15 cr.In hospital= 1.2 cr.Statics u find 7999998 person any time in jail.Then balance 2 r U me . U R BUSY IN PHILOSOPICAL THINKING. How can I handle INDIA ALONE?

Great Calculation: Only 20% boys have brains. Rest have Girlfriends