All tragedies are finished by a death.. All comedies are finished by a marriage..

A man in US kicks a dog to death which was abt to bite a lady.Paper reports:US citizen saves lady frm dog.Man says I'm not U.S citizen.So reprt changd,foreign hero saves lady frm dogMan says he is frm Pak Nxt days headlines:Terorist attacks local dog.

My Mobile had an Accident with NOKIA. Admitted in LG Hospital, Samsung Nagar, BSNL Chok, opp. SONY gali. Dr. MOTOROLA says matter is serious. Plzzz Donate SMS

At marriage function, old ppl usd 2 pull my cheeks & say "U R NEXT"Nw they stopped it.U knw y? B coz I startd doing d same at funerals!

Behind every successful man, there is a woman And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two woman.

Hai tu agar mera dilbar, Hai tu agar mera dilbar, To aaj ke lunch ka bill tu bhar

Speaking Italian is hard, but I eat and drink it without difficulties!

Sir to Student:"What is the Similarity Btween Girl frnd & Mobile??" Student:- Sir Both are Diconnected WhenThere is "No Balance"

i want u 2 know dat our friendship means alot 2 me.U cry i cry.U lauf i lauf.U jump out of da window... I look down & den... i lauf again

Defination of a NURSE-> A young and beautiful woman who fingers u in all places n holds ur hand and then expects ur pulse to be normal

Do u know similarity between Dinosaurs and Decent Girls? Both don't exist.

I mixed RUM in water and got drunk. I mixed BRANDY in water and got drunk. I mixed WHISKY in water and got drunk again. Now I have decided never to drink water again !!!