Banta: What's the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer? Santa: The taste.

Santa: I have swallowed a key. Doctor: When? Santa: 3 months back! Doctor: What were you doing till now? Santa: I was using duplicate key, now I have lost it too.

Ek Sardar Ne god Se Pucha:Kya Mai Agle Janam Me Gadha Ban Sakta Hoon?God Ne Jawab Diya,ek Hi Facility Baar Baar Nahi Mil Sakti..

Santa was driving car zigzag on the road. Traffic inspector stopped him. Santa: Sir, I am learning the car. Inspector: without instructor ? Santa: Sir, this is a correspondence course.

Santa: I got married because I was tired of cooking, cleaning home and washing clothes.Banta: Amazing, I got divorce for the same reason.

Sardarji was getting down at every station, buying ticket next station.Asked why he was doing so, he said,'the doctor told me to avoid long journey

A sardarji had a daily routine, going to office in bus and then returning home by it. One day he got late for the bus to return home. He ran after the bus and reached home running and huffing. After reaching his house he told his wife that he had saved Rs.3 by running after the bus and reaching home. Instead of getting an acknowledgementhe got a huge slap from his wife. Sardarji was puzzled? He asked his wife that why did she slap him. Her reply was, 'Ig you had run after a taxi you could have saved Rs.70 instead of Rs.3!

Ek baar ek sardar sukhe khet mein boat chala raha hota hai. Doosara sardar apni Biwi ko leke scooter pe jaa raha tha. Pehle Sardar ko boat chalate dekh, woh apni biwi se kehta hai "dekho aise sardaro ne hi to sardar ka naam kharab kar rakha hai, woh to mujhe swimming nahi aati, nahi to mein usey bahut maarta."

SANTAr: Doctor help me, mein jab baat karta huun to muje sirf awaaz sunai deti hai, aadmi nahi dikhta. Dr: Aaisa kab hota hai? SANTA: Phone karte waqt.

TEACHER : you call your mother as MUM.. what will you call your mother's younger sister & elder sister? Santa singh : MINIMUM & MAXIMUM...

Ek sardar car me battery lagwane gaya, Mechanic ne poocha "EXIDE" ki lagaun? Sardar bole: yar, bar-bar kaun ayega DONO SIDE KI LAGADE

Santa standing on platform suddenly jumps on the railway track. Banta: Santa u'll die. Santa: U'll die bcoz haven’t u heard train is coming on platform