Magistrate: How dare u stole that diamond ring frm the jewellers shop.Santa: It was written in Bold letter "DON'T MISS THIS GOLDEN OPPORTUNITY.."

INTERVIEWER: Imagine that u r in a closed room & all doors & windows r closed. How can u escape if the room caught FIRE? SARDAR: very simple. Stop imagining

Santa gav his mobile 2 banta and said"please send a love msg 2 my lover banta:y cant u send santa:AREY,MERA HAND WRITING KARAB HAI!

Why did santa keep the door open while bathing? Because he was afraid that someone might watch him from the key hole.

Santa: Oh god! Please make New York, the capital of Punjab! Banta: Why are you praying so? Santa: Bcz, that is what I have written in the exam

A Sardar buys a ticket and wins the lottery. He goes to Delhi to claim it and the man verifies his ticket number. The Sardar says, "I want my 20 lakhs. The man replied, "No, sir. It doesn't work that way. We give you one lakh today and then you'll get the rest spread out for the next 19 weeks." The Sardar said, "Oh, no. I want all my money right now! I won it and I want it." Again, the man explained that he would only get a lakh that day and the rest during the next 19 weeks. The Sardar, furious with the man, screams out, "Look, I want my money! If you're not going to give me my 20 lakhs right now, then I want my five rupees back!"

Santa Singh hurries into the emergency room late one night with the tip of his index finger shot off. 'How did this happen?' the emergency room doctor asked him. 'well, I was trying to commit suicide,' Santa replied. 'What?' sputtered the doctor. 'You tried to commit suicide by shooting your finger off?' 'No! No! No! I put the gun to my ear, and I thought: This is going to make a loud noise. So I put my finger in the other ear before I pulled the trigger.'

Santa: Do you know English? Banta: Yes Santa: Ok! Then tell what is the opposite of NAAG PANCHAMI? Banta: So simple Yaar... NAAG DO NOT PUNCH ME.

Santa 2 girlfriend: Darling, am I the first man you ever kissed? Girl: Of course, you r. But, why do all men ask the same silly question?

Once Professor Santa asked a plumber to come to his college. You know why? Because he wanted to check from where the question paper is leaking.

Santa:kal mere pitaji kuwe me gir gaye aur jor jorse chilatey rhe.Banta:ab kaise hai? Santa:Ab teek honge,kal se kuwe se koi aawaz nahi ayi.

Santa opened a petrol pump, but not even one customer went there. You know why? Because he opened petrol pump on second floor..