SANTAr: Doctor help me, mein jab baat karta huun to muje sirf awaaz sunai deti hai, aadmi nahi dikhta. Dr: Aaisa kab hota hai? SANTA: Phone karte waqt.

Q: How did Santa cheat the railways? A: He bought the ticket and didn't travel.

banta: What are you doing? Santa: Washing myself, of course banta: Without soap and water? Santa: Haven't you ever heard of dry cleaning

Santa & his wife buy coffee in a shop. Santa says... Drink quickly...... Wife asks why... Santa says hot coffee Rs.5 and cold coffee Rs.10.

Masterji: kal school kyu nahi aaya. Santa: Gir gaya tha or lag gayi. Masterji: kahan gire, kahan lagi? Santa: Takiye pe gira tha aur AANKH lag gayi..

santa took an answering machine home and fixed it home somewhere in Rajasthan,but two days later disconnected it because he was getting complaints like "Saala phone utha ke bolta hai ghar pe nahin hai" ( "he picks up the receiver and then says he is not at home" )

Man askd Santa:why U prefer prepaid connection than postpaid?Santa: prepaid me bahut fayda hai,call k bad bill badneke bajay kuM Hota hai

A drunk santa fails from 3rd floor. People gather around & ask: "Sardar ji ki hoya?" He said"pata nahin main v hune aya haan"!!!

Santa singh to his friend: Yar bari mushkil main hoon mairi bivi mujh say 1 kiss ka 50RS laiti hay ..... friend: acha, yar to bara lucky hay doosron say to wo 500RS laiti hay.

Santa and Banta are waiting at a bus stop, when a bus pulls up and opens the door. Banta leans inside and asks the driver, "Will this bus take me to Chandigarh?" The bus driver shakes his head and says, "No, I'm Sorry." At this Santa leans inside, smiles and twitters, "Will it take ME?"

Santa, where's your homework?" the teacher said sternly to the little boy while holding out her hand. "My dog ate it," was his solemn response. "Santa, I've been a teacher for eighteen years. Do you really expect me to believe that?" "It's true, Miss, I swear," insisted the boy. "I had to force him, but he ate it!"

Jeeto: Dekho woh admi mujhe ghoor-ghoor ke dekh raha hai. Santa: Woh to kabadia hai, raddi pe nazar rakhna uski aadat hai