Why couldn't the santa write the number "eleven"? He didn't know which "one" comes first...

Girl: Will u marry me? Santa: No, humare yahan shaadi sirf relatives mein hi hoti hai. Mummy ne Papa se, Didi ne Jijaji se aur Bhaiya ne Bhabhi se

A Sardar buys a ticket and wins the lottery. He goes to Delhi to claim it and the man verifies his ticket number. The Sardar says, "I want my 20 lakhs. The man replied, "No, sir. It doesn't work that way. We give you one lakh today and then you'll get the rest spread out for the next 19 weeks." The Sardar said, "Oh, no. I want all my money right now! I won it and I want it." Again, the man explained that he would only get a lakh that day and the rest during the next 19 weeks. The Sardar, furious with the man, screams out, "Look, I want my money! If you're not going to give me my 20 lakhs right now, then I want my five rupees back!"

Santa went to see a gal for marriage. Their families decided to leave them for some talk. After some time, Santa asks: Behenji, tusin kinne behen-bhai ho? Girl: Vaise taan 3 si, par hun 4 ho gaye.

SANTA enters kitchen, opens sugar container, looks inside and closes it. He does this again and again. Why?Because his Doctor told him to check sugar level regularly.

Santa's father gave him a gun on wedding night & said: Fire in air if ur wife is virgin, shoot her if not.Santa fired in air 1st night & shot her 2nd night.

Lady to inspector Santa: My husband went to buy potatos 5 days ago, he hasn't came back yet! Santa: Why don't u cook something else?

Masterji: kal school kyu nahi aaya. Santa: Gir gaya tha or lag gayi. Masterji: kahan gire, kahan lagi? Santa: Takiye pe gira tha aur AANKH lag gayi..

Santa roj apni kichen me jata,sugar box kholta or band kar deta! Why ? Because doctor ne jo kaha tha ke apni sugar roj check karna....!

Santa : 'Have you ever heard of the Suez Canal?' Banta : 'Yes, I have' Santa : 'Well, my father dug it.' Banta : 'That's nothing, have you ever heard of Dead sea?' Santa : 'Yes, I have.' Banta : 'Well, my father killed it.'

Sardar bought a new colour tv and put it in the water!!! why.? Why? Why?To check whether colour goes or not..!

SANTA Used to go college with his Dog ... After few years he had to go alone why ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? Beacause the Dog GRADUATED.