First-aid teacher: What would you do if you broke your arm in two places? Lil Banta: I'd never go to either place again!

Santa goes to buy a underwear. On choosing one he asks: How much for this? Shopkeeper: Rs 500 Santa: Arey bhai daily waer dikhaao, Party wear nahin chahiye.

Santa Singh: Will this bus take me to Jalandhar? Driver: Which part? Santa Singh: All of me, of course!

Banta: tell me five FERROUCIOUS animals that you can think of...... Santa: 3 lions and 2 tigers.

Santa: What do you call a wife who is beautiful, intelligent, understanding, caring, nvr jealous and a great cook? Banta: "Afwaahh"!!

Santa Singh hurries into the emergency room late one night with the tip of his index finger shot off. 'How did this happen?' the emergency room doctor asked him. 'well, I was trying to commit suicide,' Santa replied. 'What?' sputtered the doctor. 'You tried to commit suicide by shooting your finger off?' 'No! No! No! I put the gun to my ear, and I thought: This is going to make a loud noise. So I put my finger in the other ear before I pulled the trigger.'

In aptitude test…River Kaveri is in which state? SaNTA: liquid state.

Santa ke ghar sasural wale aye,Biwi ne kaha jao Mehmano ke liye kuch lekar aao...!Santa bahar gaya aur Taxi le kar aa gaya!!

Santa train ki patri par so gaya..Ek admi bola train ayegi to mar jayega!Santa:Plane upar se gaya kuch nahi hua to train kya chiz he!

Santa : Kal rat 3ghante tak ENGLISH FILM dekhi, Na Koi Scene tha..Na Aawaz..!Banta : Film ka Naam kya tha?Santa : "NO DISC INSERTED.

Santa always study in front of a mirror because of 3 reasons:1. It helps saving revision time.2. He can keep a watch on himself.3. He likes combined studies

An astronomer was watching the sky from his telescope. Santa was observing him. Suddenly a star falls, seeing that Santa shouted, "Kya nishana lagaya hai!"