I am a killer, I kill people for money. But because you are my friend, I'll kill you for nothing

Slogan written on a bald man's T-shrt GOD MADE SUM PERFECT HEADS ON D REST HE PUT HAIR 2 HIDE HIS MISTAKE

While walking down the street, I heard an old man say "I've been in love with the same woman for almost 50 years now." I was touched until I heard him say "I wish she knew."

If u see the moon,u can see the beauty of god. If u see the Sun,u can see the power of god. If u see the mirror,u can see the comedy of god!

How did an intelligent boy propose to girl ,he took the girl along wid him on a boat and at the middle of river said "Marry me or leave the boat"

ALCOHOLcontains FEMALE HORMONESProof:After drinkng, men gain weighttalk unnecesarilyBcome extra emotional& start fighting wthout any reason

Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets them."

Technology Impact: Dad emails: Dear son, How r u, ur mom and i are fine & v miss u lot,Plz turnoff ur PC & cum downstairs for dinner..

A man in US kicks a dog to death which was abt to bite a lady.Paper reports:US citizen saves lady frm dog.Man says I'm not U.S citizen.So reprt changd,foreign hero saves lady frm dogMan says he is frm Pak Nxt days headlines:Terorist attacks local dog.

Ladki ek aisi paheli hai, kabhi teri to kabhi meri saheli hai. Kharcha karo to bole "darling, how are you?". Na karo to bole "brother, who are you?".

Conducting a Blood Test On U....Testing In Progress...Testing...Testing...Result.......... ........< Honey In Veins > No wonder U R So Sweeeeeettttttttt.....!!!!!

Sms B Bade Kamal Ki Chiz He 20Gadho Ko Sms Karo 10Padte He 5Ko Smjh Me Aata He 4 To Kanjus Hote He 1Murga Kismat Se Fasta H Jo Reply Karta H