MAN to santa: I got a BRAND new FORD iKON for my wife. santa:WOW! that's an UNBELIEVABLE & EXCELLENT EXCHANGE OFFER.

Napolean: In my dictionary there's no word called "IMPOSSIBLE" SANTA:Abhi bolne se kya faida,jab kharida tabhi barabar dekhna chahiye tha...!!!...

Teacher: What should be in a book to make it a bestseller? Pappu: A girl on the cover and no cover on the girl.

Santa was busy removing wheels from his car Banta: Pahiye kyun khol rahe ho? Santa: Anpadh gawaar! Dikhta nahi kya Samne likha hai-Parking for 2 wheelar

Santa sent Rs10000 unsigned cheque to PM's Flood Relief Fund & wrote"Cheque is unsigned bcoz, I do not want any publicity..

Teacher:Oxygen is must for Breathing . It was discovered in 1773.Sardar:Thank God I was born after that .Pehla Paida hota to mar hi jata

Sardar was busy removing a wheel 4m his auto.A man ask sardar Yr u removing a wheel 4m ur auto.sardar :can u read parking for 2 wheeler

Why couldn't the santa write the number "eleven"? He didn't know which "one" comes first...

Santa :- jaldi ek cold drink de, ladai hone wali hai.. Shop Keeper :- lo ! Shopkeeper :- jaldi ek or de, ladai hone wali hai... Shopkeeper :- lekin ladai kab hogi... Shopkeeper :-jab tu paise maangega tab

Magistrate: How dare u stole that diamond ring frm the jewellers shop.Santa: It was written in Bold letter "DON'T MISS THIS GOLDEN OPPORTUNITY.."

Some tourists in the Punjab Museum of Natural History were marveling at the dinosaur bones. One of them asked the guard, Santa Singh 'Can you tell me how old the dinosaur bones are?' Santa replied, 'They are 3 million, four years, and six months old.' 'That's an awfully exact number,' says the tourist. 'How do you know their age so precisely?' Santa answered, 'Well, the dinosaur bones were three million years old when I started working here, and that was four and a half years ago.'

Santa falls in love with a nurse... After much thinking, he finally writes a love letter to her: "I luv u sister."