Teacher: Why are you late? santa: Because of the sign. Teacher: What sign? santa: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."

Man: I got a brand new Ford IKON 4 my wife!Santa: Wow! That's an unbelievable exchange offer!

Postman: I have to come 5 miles to deliver you this packet. Santa: Why did u come so far? Instead u could have posted it....

Santa 2 Bill Gates:Sir,How is it tht ur name is Gates bt u r selling WINDOWS

A Sardar buys a ticket and wins the lottery. He goes to Delhi to claim it and the man verifies his ticket number. The Sardar says, "I want my 20 lakhs. The man replied, "No, sir. It doesn't work that way. We give you one lakh today and then you'll get the rest spread out for the next 19 weeks." The Sardar said, "Oh, no. I want all my money right now! I won it and I want it." Again, the man explained that he would only get a lakh that day and the rest during the next 19 weeks. The Sardar, furious with the man, screams out, "Look, I want my money! If you're not going to give me my 20 lakhs right now, then I want my five rupees back!"

Sardar writing a letter:My sister had a baby ths morning. I havnt heard that its a boy or a girl,So i dnt knw whether i m uncle or aunty

Santa ke bagiche mein bahut sare ped - paudhe thay, Santa naukar ko bola ped-paudhon ko pani dal. Naukar: Sahab baarish ho rahi hai. Santa: Abe to Chatri leke dal.

Santa: May I come in Sir? IntervieweWait Please.. Santa: 75 KG Sir!

Gal to Banta: Kya shaadi k baad bi tum muje itna pyar karoge? Banta: Kyon nahin? Mein to diwana hoon shadi-shuda aurton ka.

Santa was shopping in store.Salesman: Sir, would u like to use a pocket calculator?Santa: No thanx. I know how many pockets I have

INTERVIEWER: Imagine that u r in a closed room & all doors & windows r closed. How can u escape if the room caught FIRE? SARDAR: very simple. Stop imagining

A lady calls Santa for repairing door bell. Santa doesn’t turns up for 4 days. Lady calls again, Santa replies: I'm coming daily since 4 days, I press the bell but no one comes out.