Santa Singh hurries into the emergency room late one night with the tip of his index finger shot off. 'How did this happen?' the emergency room doctor asked him. 'well, I was trying to commit suicide,' Santa replied. 'What?' sputtered the doctor. 'You tried to commit suicide by shooting your finger off?' 'No! No! No! I put the gun to my ear, and I thought: This is going to make a loud noise. So I put my finger in the other ear before I pulled the trigger.'

SANTA:Shaadi premika se mat karnaa.BANTA:Kyon?? SANTA:Kyoki,Shadi se pehle vo Romantic lagti aur baad me uska,ROM ROM ANTIC Lagta he!

DAKU-TERA NAAM KYA HAI.LADY-RITA. DAKU-MERI BEHANKA NAAM BI RITA THA.JA TUJE MAF KIYA.DAKU-TERA KYA NAAM HAI?SANTASANTA,PAR PYARSE LOGMUJE RITA KEHTE HAI.

Ultimate answer while changing the job. Interviewer: Why did you change your last job? Santa: Because the company shifted and didn't tell me where.

Santa to nurse-I luv u tumne mera dil chura liya hai,Nurse-Chal jhutha humne to sirf kidney churayi hai dil ko to hath bhi nahi lagaya…

Santa : Kal rat 3ghante tak ENGLISH FILM dekhi, Na Koi Scene tha..Na Aawaz..!Banta : Film ka Naam kya tha?Santa : "NO DISC INSERTED.

Santa ki patni ne santa se boli aap hazaro me ek hai. santa ne ek tappad mara aur bola baki 999 koun hai?

Sardar on April 1st: maine pani ko ullu bana diya aaj. Frnd: pani ko, wo kaise? Srdr:Oye!maine pani garam kiya aur thande pani se naha liya.

Sardar writing a letter:My sister had a baby ths morning. I havnt heard that its a boy or a girl,So i dnt knw whether i m uncle or aunty

Santa: Oh god! Please make New York, the capital of Punjab! Banta: Why are you praying so? Santa: Bcz, that is what I have written in the exam

Pappu while filling up a form: What should I write against mother tongue.? Santa: Very long...!

Santa: WHat is another difference between a mosquito and a fly? Banta: A fly can fly but a mosquito cannt mosquito.