First-aid teacher: What would you do if you broke your arm in two places? Lil Banta: I'd never go to either place again!

Santa:Judge Sahab,Mujhe Talaq Chahie Pichle 1Saal Se Meri Biwi Ne Mujhse Baat Nahi Ki Judge:1Baar Firse Sochle,Aisi Biwi Kismat Se Mili Hai

A Sardar buys a ticket and wins the lottery. He goes to Delhi to claim it and the man verifies his ticket number. The Sardar says, "I want my 20 lakhs. The man replied, "No, sir. It doesn't work that way. We give you one lakh today and then you'll get the rest spread out for the next 19 weeks." The Sardar said, "Oh, no. I want all my money right now! I won it and I want it." Again, the man explained that he would only get a lakh that day and the rest during the next 19 weeks. The Sardar, furious with the man, screams out, "Look, I want my money! If you're not going to give me my 20 lakhs right now, then I want my five rupees back!"

Banta: What's the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer? Santa: The taste.

Santa sent a SMS to his pregnant wife. Couple of seconds later he received a report on his phone and he started to dance. The report said: 'Delivered'

A beautiful girl was passing by..Santa : Kya maal hai yaarBanta : Arey haa maal se yaad aaya bhabiji kaisi hai

Masterji: kal school kyu nahi aaya. Santa: Gir gaya tha or lag gayi. Masterji: kahan gire, kahan lagi? Santa: Takiye pe gira tha aur AANKH lag gayi..

Sardar Opened A AutoMobile Service Center. But not Even a Single Vehicle Came there... Y..? 'Bcoz He Started the Shop on Third Floor..

3 sardars were going on a bike. Traffic Police raises the hand to stop them. Sardar replies- "Oye pagal ho gaya kya? Pehle hi 3 baithe hai, Tu kaha baithega.."

Doctor:Bachey ko paani dene se pehle boil ker lena chahiyeSardar:Lekin Janab Boil krne se bacha mar to nahi jayega na!

SANTA:BANTA! KHIDKI SE JALDI KOOD,POLICE AA RAHI HAI!BANTA:LEKIN YE13V MANZIL HAISANTA:YAAR!YE SAKUN APSAKUN SOCHNE KA WAQT NAHI HAI.KOOD JA!

Santa-Kal Muje 10 logo ne Peeta. Frnd-Fir Tune kya kiya? Santa-Mene unse kaha salo 1-1 karke Aao. Frnd-Phir? Santa-Phir kya,Salo ne 1-1 karke dubara Peeta !.