Banta: Name the 3 fastest means of communication. Santa: Telephone, Television, Tell-a-woman.

A Sardar buys a ticket and wins the lottery. He goes to Delhi to claim it and the man verifies his ticket number. The Sardar says, "I want my 20 lakhs. The man replied, "No, sir. It doesn't work that way. We give you one lakh today and then you'll get the rest spread out for the next 19 weeks." The Sardar said, "Oh, no. I want all my money right now! I won it and I want it." Again, the man explained that he would only get a lakh that day and the rest during the next 19 weeks. The Sardar, furious with the man, screams out, "Look, I want my money! If you're not going to give me my 20 lakhs right now, then I want my five rupees back!"

Santa ka radio kharab hua usne khol k dekha, andar mara CHUHA mila, ye dekh k santa gusse me bola oh ho chalega kaise singer hi mar gaya hai

Banta: Pareshan lag rahe ho.Santa: Yaar baap ban ne wala hu.Banta: Yeh to khushi ki baat hai.Santa: Lekin biwi ko nahi pata.

Santa: WHat is another difference between a mosquito and a fly? Banta: A fly can fly but a mosquito cannt mosquito.

INTERVIEWER: Imagine that u r in a closed room & all doors & windows r closed. How can u escape if the room caught FIRE? SARDAR: very simple. Stop imagining

Sardar ne makkhi ke pankh tod ke kaha; Udh ja. But Makkhi nahi udi, Sardar ne kaha; Saabit hua "agar makkhi ke pankh tod diye jaye to makkhi sun nahi sakti

Santa: Mom, last night when I opened the toilet door, the light went on itself. Mother: Idiot, you again peed in the refrigerator!

Santa took 18 more people with him to watch a film. On being questioned about the big group, they replied that the film was only for above 18...

Ek dost ne santa se poocha "yaar tu hamesha foreign channel kyondekhta rehta."....Santa "yaar kuch bijli unki bhi kharch hone do."

TeacheA ke baad kya aata hai? Santa thinks hard & then says: Kya bolti tu

SANTA- I saw my wife going to movie with watchman Friend- Didn't U follow them?SANTA- No yaar, I have already seen that movie..!