Santa:What's the use of having a train schedule if the trains are always late. Engineer:How would we know they were late,if we didn't have a schedule?

SrdI kis my wif b4 i go to office everyday,& U? Frnd: I kis ur wif after u go to office everyday. SardaHa ha i'm 1st.

Santa in Bio practical exam.Prof: Tell d birds name by seeing its leg.Snta: I don't know.Prof: U faild. Wat's ur name?Snta: C my Leg & TELL...!:

SANTA Ko Apna Gadha Bechna Tha Unho Ne Apne Ek Dost Ko Letter Likha Agr Tume Kabhi Kisi Gadhe Ki Zroorut Ho To mujhe yad karna.

Jeeto: Dekho woh admi mujhe ghoor-ghoor ke dekh raha hai. Santa: Woh to kabadia hai, raddi pe nazar rakhna uski aadat hai

Preeto: There's trouble with the car. It has water in the carburetor. Banta: Water in the carburetor? That's ridiculous. Preeto: I tell you the car has water in the carburetor. Banta: You don't even know what a carburetor is. I'll check it out. Where's the car? Preeto: In the pool.

Santa Singh and wife came upon a wishing well. Santa Singh leaned over, made a wish and threw in a penny. The wife decided to make a wish, too. But she leaned over too much, fell into the well, and drowned. Santa Singh was stunned for awhile but then smiled and said, 'It really works!'

Heights of Friendship: Santa commiting suicide, someone asked the reason. He said: My wife ran with my friend and I can't live without my friend.

Preeto: Raat ko aap peeke gutter mein gir gaye the. Banta: Kya bataoon, sub galat sangati ka asar hai, hum 4 dost... 1 bottle, aur woh teeno kambhakt peeten nahin.

Taxi Driver- petrol khatm ho gaya hai. Gadi aage nahi ja sakti.Santa- KOI BAAT NAHI, reverse lelo, vapas ghar chalenge

Santa saw a man stealing a purse. THIEF:"There is Rs.1100 in the purse. V can take 50-50" Santa : Okay,bt Wht bout d remaining 1000?

After returning back from a foreign trip, santa asked his wife, Do I look like a foreigner? Wife: No! Why? Santa: In London a lady asked me r u a foreigner?