Santa, where's your homework?" the teacher said sternly to the little boy while holding out her hand. "My dog ate it," was his solemn response. "Santa, I've been a teacher for eighteen years. Do you really expect me to believe that?" "It's true, Miss, I swear," insisted the boy. "I had to force him, but he ate it!"
Santa: "When I woke up this morning, I felt like going out and getting a job." Banta: "Did you?" Santa: "No. I stayed in bed until the feeling passed."
Judge: You are charged with throwing your mother-in-law out of your fourth-story window. Banta: I did it without thinking, your Honor. Judge: Thats no excuse! Don't you see how dangerous it might have been for anyone passing by at the time?
Photographer Santa was focusing on the dead body's face in a funeral function. Suddenly all the relatives started beating him - why? He said "SMILE PLEASE"
