A Sardar buys a ticket and wins the lottery. He goes to Delhi to claim it and the man verifies his ticket number. The Sardar says, "I want my 20 lakhs. The man replied, "No, sir. It doesn't work that way. We give you one lakh today and then you'll get the rest spread out for the next 19 weeks." The Sardar said, "Oh, no. I want all my money right now! I won it and I want it." Again, the man explained that he would only get a lakh that day and the rest during the next 19 weeks. The Sardar, furious with the man, screams out, "Look, I want my money! If you're not going to give me my 20 lakhs right now, then I want my five rupees back!"

Santa attending a interview in a software company.Interviewer:Do u knw MS Office?SANTA:Give the address.I wll find out where it is

Jeeto: Dekho woh admi mujhe ghoor-ghoor ke dekh raha hai. Santa: Woh to kabadia hai, raddi pe nazar rakhna uski aadat hai

Having lost his donkey santa, got down to his knees and started thanking God. A passerby saw him and asked, "Your donkey is missing; what are you thanking God for ?"santa replied "I am thanking Him for seeing to it that I wasn't riding the donkey at that time, otherwise I would have been missing too."

First-aid teacher: What would you do if you broke your arm in two places? Lil Banta: I'd never go to either place again!

Teacher: Pappu, TAMSO MA JYOTIR GAMYA" shloka ka kya arth hai? Pappu: Tum so jayo maa, mein Jyoti ke pass ja raha hoon.

Sardar:My grandfather is 90 years old & still doesn't use glasses! Friend:How is it possible? Sardar:He drinks directly from bottle..

Santa har sunday holi khelta tha1 admi ne pucha santa ji aap har sunday holi Q khelte ho ?santa :- OYE, SUNDAY MATLAB HOLI-DAY..

Santa at an Art Gallery: I suppose this horrible looking thing is what you call Modern art? Art dealer: I beg your pardon sir, that's a mirror!

santa orders pizza. Waiter: Sir shud i cut it into 4 pieces or into 8 pieces? santa: 4 hi karde 8 khaye nahi jayenge

Santa:What's the use of having a train schedule if the trains are always late. Engineer:How would we know they were late,if we didn't have a schedule?

Santa bought a car on loan… He didn’t pay the dues, the bank took away his car.Santa: If I knew this, I,d have taken a loan for my marriage also.