Santa:What's the use of having a train schedule if the trains are always late. Engineer:How would we know they were late,if we didn't have a schedule?

Napolean:"In my dictionary there's no word called "IMPOSSIBLE" Sardar:"Abi bolne se kya faida,jab kharida tabi barabar dekhna chahie na.

An ASS,behind another ASS,behind that I,and behind me the whole NATION....A Sardar teaching his children the spelling of ASSASSINATION!!!

Banta: Oye tu har SMS ko do baar kyon bhej raha hai? Santa: Kyunki tujhe agar ek forward karna ho to dusra tere paas rahe..!!

Mngr:Y ru late?sardr:Sir on the way I saw my frnd& came in his vehicleMngr:u came here by vehicle,den y late?sardr:that is Road roller.

A Sardar buys a ticket and wins the lottery. He goes to Delhi to claim it and the man verifies his ticket number. The Sardar says, "I want my 20 lakhs. The man replied, "No, sir. It doesn't work that way. We give you one lakh today and then you'll get the rest spread out for the next 19 weeks." The Sardar said, "Oh, no. I want all my money right now! I won it and I want it." Again, the man explained that he would only get a lakh that day and the rest during the next 19 weeks. The Sardar, furious with the man, screams out, "Look, I want my money! If you're not going to give me my 20 lakhs right now, then I want my five rupees back!"

A Sardar puts lot of lipstick on his forehead..........Why?.....coz....he wants to make up his Mind

Santa n Banta were watching a cricket match. When Dhoni hits a boundary. Banta: Kya Goal mara. Santa: Raha Na bewakoof ka bewakoof, Goal is mein nahin cricket mein hota hai

When Titanic was drowning an Italian asks sardarji, how far is land? Sardar-2kms. Italian jumps into the sea and asks.. Which direction? Sardarji…. Downwards!!!

Masterji: kal school kyu nahi aaya. Santa: Gir gaya tha or lag gayi. Masterji: kahan gire, kahan lagi? Santa: Takiye pe gira tha aur AANKH lag gayi..

Santa-Doctor,This MedicineIs Not Available At Any Medical Store.Doctor=Oh Sorry,I Forgot To Write The MedicineThat Was My Signature.

Gal to Banta: Kya shaadi k baad bi tum muje itna pyar karoge? Banta: Kyon nahin? Mein to diwana hoon shadi-shuda aurton ka.