Santa sent Rs10000 unsigned cheque to PM's Flood Relief Fund & wrote"Cheque is unsigned bcoz, I do not want any publicity..

Lady to inspector Santa: My husband went to buy potatos 5 days ago, he hasn't came back yet! Santa: Why don't u cook something else?

Teacher: Pappu, TAMSO MA JYOTIR GAMYA" shloka ka kya arth hai? Pappu: Tum so jayo maa, mein Jyoti ke pass ja raha hoon.

Master: Mein tenu kutte te essay likhan nu keha si, Likh ke kyu nahi liyanda ? Santa: Ki karda master g, jidan he mein kutte te Pen rakhia oh paj geya!!!

Some tourists in the Punjab Museum of Natural History were marveling at the dinosaur bones. One of them asked the guard, Santa Singh 'Can you tell me how old the dinosaur bones are?' Santa replied, 'They are 3 million, four years, and six months old.' 'That's an awfully exact number,' says the tourist. 'How do you know their age so precisely?' Santa answered, 'Well, the dinosaur bones were three million years old when I started working here, and that was four and a half years ago.'

Santa at petrol Pump-Bhai 1 rs Ka petrol dal de SalesMan:- Itna Sa Dalva kaha Jana Hai? Santa:- jana kaha hai,hum to aise hi piase udate hai

Santa: Yaar bachpan mein 20 male se gir gaya tha. Banta: to fir bach gaya ya mar gaya? Santa: yaad nahin hai bahut purani baat hai.

How did santa tried to kill a bird?? He took it to the top of a building and dropped it from there to die.

Santa to banta,"oye tu har sms mujhe do baar kyun bejhta hai". Banta" vo is liye, ki agar tujhe ek forward karna ho to dusra to tere paas rehna chahiye".

Santa : 'Have you ever heard of the Suez Canal?' Banta : 'Yes, I have' Santa : 'Well, my father dug it.' Banta : 'That's nothing, have you ever heard of Dead sea?' Santa : 'Yes, I have.' Banta : 'Well, my father killed it.'

A sardarji had a daily routine, going to office in bus and then returning home by it. One day he got late for the bus to return home. He ran after the bus and reached home running and huffing. After reaching his house he told his wife that he had saved Rs.3 by running after the bus and reaching home. Instead of getting an acknowledgementhe got a huge slap from his wife. Sardarji was puzzled? He asked his wife that why did she slap him. Her reply was, 'Ig you had run after a taxi you could have saved Rs.70 instead of Rs.3!

Taxi Driver- petrol khatm ho gaya hai. Gadi aage nahi ja sakti.Santa- KOI BAAT NAHI, reverse lelo, vapas ghar chalenge