santa (biwi se) peg banane ke baad, "pee isey." BiWi: Chheee! Kadwa hai!" santa Aur tu sochti hai ke main roz mazey karta hoon???

Banta: Oye tu har SMS ko do baar kyon bhej raha hai? Santa: Kyunki tujhe agar ek forward karna ho to dusra tere paas rahe..!!

Bus AccidentMan Cryin: "Mera hath katgaya.Bot dukh raha he"Santa:"Abe,chup beth.dekh wo admika gala kat gaya,fir b wo chup-chap pada hena!"

Judge: This is 3rd time u are coming to court. Dont U feel shame? Sardar:"u are coming daily, dont u feel shame?

2srdar jngl me:Samne sher aya,1ne mitti sher ki ankh me dalke bhagne lga,2nd wahi ruk gya 1st:abe bhag 2nd:me kyun bhagu mitti tune dali he

After bus accident.. man crying: mera hath kat gaya. bahut dard ho raha hai. santa: abey chup baith. wo dekh uska gala kat gaya, fir bhi chup-chaap pada hai..!!

Pathologist:Ye urine sample nai,Apple juice hai!Santa's wife:Ek phone kar loon?Dr:Why?Wife:Santaji ko batana hai k urine botle unke tiffin me chali gayi hai

Banta: Kya Hua,Ye Mitti Kyun Khod Raha Hai? Santa: Papa ji Ne Bola Mene Unka Nam Mitti Me Mila Diya, Wohi Dund Raha Hu

Santa:Judge Sahab,Mujhe Talaq Chahie Pichle 1Saal Se Meri Biwi Ne Mujhse Baat Nahi Ki Judge:1Baar Firse Sochle,Aisi Biwi Kismat Se Mili Hai

santa took an answering machine home and fixed it home somewhere in Rajasthan,but two days later disconnected it because he was getting complaints like "Saala phone utha ke bolta hai ghar pe nahin hai" ( "he picks up the receiver and then says he is not at home" )

santa to banta… why are you watching the funeral by BINOCULAR… santa replies because DUR KA RISHTEDAR THA yaar!

Santa: "God, if you give me 100 rupees, I will donate 50 rupees in temple". (After waliking some distance, he finds a 50 rupee note) Santa: "Shame on you God, you don't even trust me a little? You have already taken your share!"