In a train, ticket checker to a saint: Ticket please! Saint: I don't have. TT: Where do you want to go? Saint: Lord Ram's birth place, Ayodhya! TT: Come, lets go! Saint: Where? TT: Lord Krishna'a birth place, Jail.
Jasmeet : "Your honor, I want to divorce my husband Santa." Judge : "But why ?" Jasmeet : "Because he is not faithful to me." Judge : "How do you know ?" Jasmeet : "My lord, not a single child resembles him."
Santa: "God, if you give me 100 rupees, I will donate 50 rupees in temple". (After waliking some distance, he finds a 50 rupee note) Santa: "Shame on you God, you don't even trust me a little? You have already taken your share!"
Lady doctor: tum roz subah clinic ke bahar khade ho kar aurto ko kyon ghurte ho? Santa: ji aap hi ne bahar likha hai "aurton ko dekhne ka samay subah 10 se 12".