Jeeto: I didn't know you smoked. When did you start? Preeto: That night my husband came home early and found a cigarette butt in the ashtray.

Sardars friend slaps himSardar:U slapped me seriously or just for fun?Friend:SeriouslySardar:Then its ok, I dont like people making FUN OF ME!...

My father dug the Suez Canal. Banta: That's nothing, have you heard of Dead Sea?Santa: Yes, I have.Banta: My dad killed it.

Santa:Jab tumhari wife gum hui to police ko kyu nahi bataya Banta:Kyuki jab mera scooter gum hua tha to Police walone 15/20 din istemaal karke lautaya tha…

Santa: Can you spell a word that has more than 100 letters in it? Banta: Post office

Santa: Me tere liye rishta le kar aaya hu.Ladki B.COM he!Banta- 'Com' to jo marji ho.Par Ladki GRADUATE honi chahiye!

After bus accident.. man crying: mera hath kat gaya. bahut dard ho raha hai. santa: abey chup baith. wo dekh uska gala kat gaya, fir bhi chup-chaap pada hai..!!

A Sardar buys a ticket and wins the lottery. He goes to Delhi to claim it and the man verifies his ticket number. The Sardar says, "I want my 20 lakhs. The man replied, "No, sir. It doesn't work that way. We give you one lakh today and then you'll get the rest spread out for the next 19 weeks." The Sardar said, "Oh, no. I want all my money right now! I won it and I want it." Again, the man explained that he would only get a lakh that day and the rest during the next 19 weeks. The Sardar, furious with the man, screams out, "Look, I want my money! If you're not going to give me my 20 lakhs right now, then I want my five rupees back!"

Santa to nurse-I luv u tumne mera dil chura liya hai,Nurse-Chal jhutha humne to sirf kidney churayi hai dil ko to hath bhi nahi lagaya…

An astronomer was watching the sky from his telescope. Santa was observing him. Suddenly a star falls, seeing that Santa shouted, "Kya nishana lagaya hai!"

Santa: My wedding is going to happen. Banta: Whats the problem now.? Santa: My wife did'nt know it...!

Santa:What's the use of having a train schedule if the trains are always late. Engineer:How would we know they were late,if we didn't have a schedule?