Tum chandar mukhi main sooraj mukhi..Main tum say dukhi tum mujh say dukhi..Tum chut per jao aur chalang lagao...Phir main bhe sukhi aur tum bhe sukhi..!

HANSA: A Prafful wife ko BEGUM kyo kahete he? PRAFFUL: Are hansa shaadi ke baad sare GUM husband ko milte he or BIWI... BE GUM ho jati he!!

One person asks to another:bhai ye khushi kya hoti hai?Second person replies:pata nahi bhai meri toh BACHPAN mein hi shaadi ho gayi thi.

2 sikh Soldiers capture a pakistani, gav him a dice & said-if u get 1,2,3,4,5 we'll kill u.Paki. askd-6 aya to?Sikh -luddio nahi kheli kya? dobara bari.

Napolean There is no such word as IMPOSSIBLE in my dictionary... Sardarji toh dictionary dekh ke kharidni thi na....!!

Lady TeacheRam make one sentence in which all tenses past, present & future are included. Ram: Sau saal pehle mujhe tumse pyar tha Aaj bhi hai aur Kal bhi rahega!

Passengr 2 Bus-Conducto Kitne Ghante Bus Me Rahete Ho?Conductr- 24 Ghante!P- Wo Kaise?Cond- "8 Ghante BUS Me Baki 16 Ghante BIWI KE BAS ME"

Man: Sir, my wife is missing. Postmaster:Bhai ye post office hai, Police station me complaint dijiyee.Man: Kya karun, khushi ke maare kuch samajh Nahi aa rha

WIFE : kyu ji! Jab bhi me aapke pass aati hu to aap Chasma pahen lete ho? HUSBANd : Doctor ne kaha hai jab SHIR-DARD aaye to Chasma pahen lena…

Santa Banta find a bomb Santa and Banta find three hand grenades and decide to take them to the police station. "What if one of them explodes before we get there?" asks Banta. "Don’t worry about it," says Santa. "We’ll just lie and tell them we only found two."

A boy shying to propose a girl finally proposed in a unique way:- "kya tum mujhe apni chita ko aag lagane ka adhikar dogi??"

Girl:Tum Hafte Main Kitni Bar Shave Karte Ho?Boy:Hafte Main Nahi, Din Main 30 Se 40 BaarGirl:Kya Tum Pagal Ho?Boy:Nhi,Main Naii Hoon